2/20/10 - Jess's mother is trying to kill her

Jess: I can just picture Lindsay out in a rainstorm holding an antenna.
Andrew: And a kite with a key.
Jess: Holding the word "show."
(This was about Lindsay trying to get the Sundance channel so she can watch the Johnny Weir reality show.  It also references the video I'm making with pictures of people holding words in a song.)

Jess: I'm glad I got to see you all before my demise.
Lindsay: I want to take a picture standing over Jess's corpse, holding a persimmon in one hand and the word "show" in the other.
(Jess is allergic to persimmons, and see the title of this post.)

New possible title for Lindsay's memoirs: "Mashed Potatoes and Outlet Shopping"

Jess: They had sausage sniffing dogs.
Andrew: Wait, sausage dogs who are sniffing, or dogs sniffing sausages?
Jess: Dogs sniffing sausages.  They save the dachshunds for heroin.

2/12/10 - Marita, Joe, and Jacki's birthdays

Leslie: I'm just gonna lesbian it off.
(on using brute force to open a tub of veggie dip)

Lindsay: What exactly is happening here?
Andrew: Canada
(watching the Vancouver 2010 Winter Olympics)

New possible title for Lindsay's memoirs: "An Overwhelming Sense of Me"